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Snuff It #1 |
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The State of Shit
It has been fairly well understood for some time now that matter and energy
are interchangeable forms of the same thing. Or as Pastor Val is fond of saying,
everything has the properties of both particles and waves. Neither can be
destroyed, and it is widely believed that our universe is composed only of these
two substances, perpetually changing into one another. In keeping with ancient
Hindu tradition, we call the thing which matter and energy are two different
forms of "shit." Shit exists as particles and waves. The universe is
shit in space.
Gravity is the tendency of shit to attract shit. But how does this work,
you ask? What is the mechanism? Is it a particle or a wave? Neither,
smarty-pants! Gravity is a property of shit. Shit compresses and
distorts dimensional space, including time. Two shits attract one another, by
compressing the so-called "fabric" of dimensional space between them.
This is not unheard of in physics, and is known as continuum theory.
The universe exists in an unknown number of dimensions, and is infinite in all
of them. Imagine everything sliced into two-dimensional planes like a salami.
Each plane is an infinite flat universe of its own. A party in our universe may
keep folks awake in any number of flat universes that happen to intersect it.
In addition, an hassle in a flat universe might not be a hassle in ours. Suppose
a flat universe happens to intersect the great wall of China. A flat inhabitant
has no choice but to go around the wall. This is referred to in the I Ching
as "tough shit". But what if a flat Genghis Khan could temporarily jump
into the third dimension? He could hop over the flat wall, return to his own
dimension, and go waste flat Peking.
Schools teach you that we inhabit a four-dimensional universe, with time as
the fourth dimension. It would be more accurate to call it a 3D universe. We
can move freely only in the first three dimensions. We are bound to a fixed
direction (forward) and speed (fast) in the fourth. We can only directly perceive
the present. The past and the future can be thought of as an infinite number of
parallel 3D universes which are forever hidden, known to us only by memory or
speculation. We are in exactly the same boat as those poor flat fuckers.
If one of us could temporarily escape and move freely in the fourth dimension,
seemingly insurmountable obstacles could be easily overcome. Suppose you were
locked in a prison cell. You could simply move backwards or forwards in time to
a point when the door was unlocked, exit the cell, and return to the time you
left, free. From the point of view of the astounded guards, you would disappear
into and reappear from nowhere.
In the same way that 4D reality may contain any number of distinct 3D universes
frozen in time, the 5D universe contains any number of distinct 4D universes, one
of which we happen to inhabit. These parallel universes all share the same shit.
The Earth exists in many distinct 4D universes and is inhabited by different
species in each one.
UFO author Jaques Vallee is correct in maintaining that UFOs are not green men
in spaceships from Alpha Centauri. UFOs are beings capable of movement in at
least five dimensions, and mostly from Earth in parallel 4D universes. They move
by using gravitation to distort dimensional space, shrinking or stretching it as
necessary. This concept has appeared in science fiction, and was referred to in
Frank Herbert's Dune trilogy as "folding space."
Physicists generally agree that black holes exist and that they are composed
of shit, with density approaching the infinite. Typical projections assume the
density of thousands of suns in a body the size of Earth. Physicists say that
whole galaxies are rushing towards each other and presumably colliding in a
terrible shit-storm to become flies on the black hole's windshield. The truth
is stranger.
The black hole's density increases linearly towards the its center. The
center is a vertex of infinite density, and since infinite density compresses
space infinitely, dimensional space does not exist at the vertex. The galaxies
are not colliding at all. The space between the galaxies is being compressed,
until the objects arrive at the vertex and are propelled through it into a
parallel universe. Suppose the Earth went through a black hole. We might
never notice. Our shit would be shrinking as our space was compressed, but how
would we know? Our rulers would be shrinking too (no pun intended).
Imagine I have a tiny, tiny speck of a black hole in a paint jar, and that
the paint jar somehow contains the black hole. The speck weighs more than the
sun, but somehow the paint jar isolates it and I can carry the black hole around
in my pocket. I might only have to remove the lid of the jar for a billionth of
a second to squirt myself out of the universe like a grapefruit seed! This is
how UFOs travel.
The discovery that UFOs are actually from Earth explains a variety of
mysteries. Why have the UFOs been known to every human society throughout
history? Because they've always been here! Why do they come to Earth when
they have the whole universe to explore? Because they live here! Why are
they being sighted more and more frequently, in increasingly violent episodes,
particularly near the sites of weapons of mass destruction? Because this is
their planet too and they don't like the way we're treating it! This last
point is especially interesting. Nuclear explosions have an unpleasant effect
on the Earth in many more dimensions than our own. We are blowing huge fucking
holes in someone else's back yard, and they don't like it. Our nuclear
experiments seem crude and very dangerous to them, like a small child with a
chemistry set. The recent sightings in Brazil suggest that our neighbors are
preparing to take more aggressive action to contain us.
Interestingly, pastor Val has seen UFOs hanging around new age crystal shows.
Why would UFOs be interested in crystals? The so-called "occult"
forces are multidimensional influences. Crystals and other riches of the Earth
are powerful and desirable in all universes. Good for you, good for them. Bad
for them, BAD FOR YOU!
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